Like a fish in water

If you could ask a fish, ‘do you know you live in water?’, it might not understand what you’re talking about. If a fish were to embark on a voyage of discovery, the very last thing it might recognize is the water in which it resides. If you asked that fish, ‘do you know you are wet?’, it would probably stare at you in confusion. A fish knows nothing of water or of being wet, because that’s its natural condition. It’s possible that more intelligent marine mammals like whales and dolphins, who might have a somewhat self-reflective mind, do realize they live in water because they can experience that there’s more than just water. However, even then, they probably don’t know they are ‘wet’. Only those who don’t consider water their natural environment understand the concept of being ‘wet’. A human knows that their hand becomes wet as soon as they dip it into water. The water clings to it. A fish might instead be able to experience dryness.

We humans are like fish. We ‘swim’ through our lives submerged in the waters of our predominantly unconscious mind with its many psychic conditions. This is so familiar to us that we don’t perceive it as ‘water’ and are unaware of the fact that other mental states exist. We don’t feel ourselves as ‘wet’, and in our unconscious state, we see undergoing various shifting psychic conditions and inner attitudes as normal and self-evident. All sorts of moods, preferences, and emotional states, both negative and positive, are accepted without reflection. Without questioning why these varying conditions ‘cling’ to us. We’re not even truly aware of their existence and their changes. It’s a kind of given. We believe our inner selves remain consistent. We fully surrender to these shifting emotional-mental conditions and many inner attitudes, thereby amplifying their strength. Sometimes we even value or despise our psychic conditions, but without examining their essence.

We hardly ever investigate pleasant-feeling inner conditions. Why would we? “Everything’s fine, isn’t it? I feel good!” We sometimes briefly examine the unpleasant ones; we might feel forced to inspect them, especially if they seem to drag us into a downward spiral, lead us towards stress, burn-out or depression, get us into trouble with the law, or result in addiction or institutionalization. What’s even more remarkable: sometimes amidst all this emotional-mental turmoil, we feel as comfortable as a fish in water…

A Different World

However, our self-reflective mind is very capable of observing and investigating our numerous psychic states for their utility and function. For this, we have a conscious Observer. We are fully capable of neutrally recognizing the psychic ‘water’ we live in for what it truly is worth. We can understand that becoming ‘wet’ from it without reflecting on it is truly undesired and rarely brings anything good. If we deeply desire freedom, we are very much capable of understanding that there’s more than just this ‘wetness’, leading us to discover that there’s another world ‘above this water’, where the movements of varying psychic states can be purely observed and valued. This is the world of Silence, where there is peace and where we can recognize that merely living in ‘water’ can be transcended. The Silent Realm of the subtle world where we are our True Self, filled with the energy of Sattva. Known and proven self-help methods to dwell in this realm and calm inner motions include meditation and mindfulness. Yet, the most crucial and effective one is self-remembrance, in which we stay in a felt observation of ourselves, no matter the situation.

Of course, we continue to ‘swim in water’, as we possess a psyche and know many moods. We can’t simply turn this ‘off’, but we no longer have to become ‘soaked’ by it or drown in it because we can learn that the Observer within us neutrally oversees it. The Observer is neutral because this consciousness is non-dual and doesn’t experience ‘two’ (or opposition) within itself, hence it knows no moods. It is our non-dual core within our mind, within our individually perceived consciousness.

Getting Wet

If we continue to identify with a myriad of inner reactions to external things and situations – depicted as ‘water’ in this metaphor – there’s simply no awareness of that other condition where we’re no longer ‘wet’. Identifying oneself with moods and ideas not perceived in self-reflection, thus giving credence to their psychological effect and to the actions that result from it, is equivalent to being ‘soaked’. We can feel our identifications yet observe them neutrally. It’s the unnatural attachment to what we believe is ‘mine’ that makes us accept it as normal, justifying all this ‘wetness’ within ourselves. Although the emotional-mental fluctuations in our subconscious mind are deeply rooted and keep re-emerging from external triggers, we can consciously and clearly observe and understand them. We can reassess them (as not useful for our inner growth), lovingly let go, and genuinely process them. The latter is essential, so these mechanisms don’t just disappear beneath a rationally conceived cover. We will start recognizing this ‘wetness’ more easily in others, ensuring that we ‘get wet’ less and less.
Essential identification on the other hand, referring to the power of our pure and natural attachment, stemming from our Ahamkara, can be appreciated and given the right place in our lives, for they enhance our essence and our self-expressive flourishing. They elevate our human condition.

Expanding on this metaphor, let’s take inspiration from the clever fish that once had the courage to leave seawater, crawl onto land into a completely different habitat, eventually becoming our mammalian ancestors. From the decisions of these creatures, our highly intelligent human life has emerged! Think about that the next time you snack on a herring.

Living ‘Underwater’, our minds are blown in all directions. Our attention is often scattered (due to multitasking and fickleness), and this is influenced by circumstances and moods of others, causing our own mood to fluctuate greatly. Numerous unconscious associations arise in us that influence our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. It can stimulate assertive behavior or the tendency to withdraw.
Being ‘Underwater’, due to our ‘normal’ psychic state of mind, we are actually subject to our mechanical reactions (thus everything ‘happens to us’, as Ouspensky mentions) and because almost everyone predominantly lives ‘underwater’, misunderstandings, issues, or even conflicts arise easily when people interact, even if their underlying needs might be almost identical. It’s clear that this leads to inner disturbances, confusion, agitation, and possibly increasing stress.
‘Above water’, our mind is quiet, leaving much room for what presents itself in it and for what we encounter ‘outside of us’. This means our mind directs an alert and open attention to what is relevant, and we remain in self-remembrance: a sentient observation of ourselves in the situation we’re in, where internal and external perceptions converge/integrate. We have our mind, which is self-reflective, under observation during the action we’re performing.
The emotional reactions and attitudes that arise in us are thus observed and are given the attention they deserve. Simple associations triggered in us by external circumstances are recognized as such and no longer lead in determining what is needed in that moment. A quiet mind is a sattvic mind, in which our neutral Observer takes on the role that we often sorely miss. It’s a conscious state where our self-reflection can be optimal and where we recognize the psychological ‘noise’ (our emo-mental mechanisms) as disruptive. This way, they play a much less active role.
With consistent practice, the silence in our mind can become more stable. The duration, frequency, and depth of moments of silence in our mind are then increasingly observed. Moments of silence are often short-lived at first (for instance, during or after an exercise or meditation) before the mind returns to its old (mechanical) ways. Thus, silence in our mind is still too infrequent, and the depth of Silence that exists behind all movement and diversity is only minimally experienced.
With practice, moments when silence dominates our mind become longer, occur more frequently, and we experience deeper depths within them. We more easily come ‘above water’. It becomes ‘ordinary’, while initially, we might have experienced it as ‘special’. It becomes self-evident. The watchful sleep of our mind diminishes, and with it, the influence that our tinted psyche has on our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Our attention span broadens more and more, making us more observant and thus learning more. Silence thus leads in all our thinking, feeling, and doing.
However, this doesn’t mean we become ‘silent people’. With such an awake mind, we can do everything we did before, only now with a clear observation of ourselves. We can thus be very active, very dynamic, and energetic. We observe ourselves ‘acting’ in the situation we are in.
We must be cautious not to create an internal ‘policeman’, a little self that pretends to be ‘quiet and awake’ but in fact, wants to ‘control’ emotions and sweep them under the spiritual rug to appear ‘wise’. This way, we deceive ourselves, and this is a nasty form of lying. There’s no point in presenting ourselves differently in situations than how we feel. What we feel, we must feel, but in the full light of our Observer watching from Silence. This way, we gain insight into triggered mechanisms and emotions that arise ‘underwater’ and can be seen ‘above water’ for what they are worth. They often hold some value, as emotion is also the language of our soul, of our essence, and shouldn’t be suppressed from a false idea of ‘wanting to be quiet’. Therefore, we must always remain ourselves, to ultimately return to ‘how we are meant to be’: free and fearless.

© Michiel Koperdraat